Jokes Collected From Emails

> Ad from Bangalore - just in case you guys are looking for an Indian > son-in-law > > > Dear Madame, > > I am an olden young uncle living only with myself in Bangaloru. > > Having seen your advertisement for marriage purposes, I decided to > press myself on you and hope you will take me nicely. > > I am a soiled son from inside Karnataka. I am nice and big, six foot > tall and six inches long. My body is filled with hardness, as because > I am working hardly. I am playing hardly also. Especially I like > cricket and I am a good batter and I am fast baller. Whenever I come > running in for balling, other batters start running. Everybody is > scared of my rapid balls that bounce a lot. > > I am very nice man. I am always laughing loudly at everyone. I am > jolly. I am gay. > > Especially ladies, they are saying I am nice and soft. I am always > giving respect to the ladies. I am always allowing ladies to get on > to

Dear Ah Lian, Thanks you for your letter. Wrong time no see you. How everything? For me, I am quiet find. You say in your letter your taukeh soh want you to chain your look? Somemore you must wear kick kok soo, hope you can wok properly. You know, Ah Kau Kia working in a soft where company now. Last week, he take I, Muthu & few of his friend to May Nonut to eat barger. After that he take we all go to kalah ok. Muthu sing and sing no stop until the sky bright. Next week, my father mother going to sellerbread 20 years annie wear sari. My father mother going to give a fist to all the kampong people. So you must come with your hole family. I only hope one day we no need to write and send letter to you and to me. Better I e-meow you, you e-meow me. I will ketchup with you soon. And when you got time, please few free to call me. Goo bye..... Worm regard, Ah Beng

Dear Wife: I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you for good. I've been a good man to you for seven years and I have nothing to show for it. These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me that you had quit your job today and that was the last straw. Last week, you came home and didn't even notice that I had gotten a new hair cut, cooked your favorite meal, and even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers later that night. You came home, nibbled at your food for two minutes, and went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don't tell me you love me anymore, you don't want sex anymore or anything. Either you're cheating on me or you don't love me. Whichever is the case,,,,I'm gone. Signed, Your EX-Husband P.S. Don't try to find me. Your sister and I are moving away to West Virginia together. Have a great life! ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- Dear Ex-Husband: Nothing has made my