Jokes Collected From Emails

First-year students at Med School were receiving their first Anatomy class with a real dead human body. They all gathered around the surgery table with the body covered with a white sheet. The professor started the class by telling them: "In medicine, it is necessary to have 2 important qualities as a doctor. The first is that you not be disgusted by anything involving the human body." For an example, the Professor pulled back the sheet, stuck his finger in the butt of the corpse, withdrew it and stuck his finger in his mouth. " Go ahead and do the same thing," he told his students. The students freaked out, hesitated for several minutes, but eventually took turns sticking a finger in the butt of the dead body and sucking on it. Each one tried his best not to puke. When everyone had finished, the Professor looked at them and told them, "The second most important quality is observation. I stuck in my Middle finger and sucked on my Index finger. Now learn to pay ...

A mechanic was removing the cylinder heads from the motor of a car when he spotted the famous heart surgeon in his shop, who was standing off to the side, waiting for the service manager to come to take a look at his car. The mechanic shouted across the garage, "Hello Doctor! Please come over here for a minute." The famous surgeon, a bit surprised, walked over to the mechanic. The mechanic straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag and asked argumentatively, "So doctor, look at this. I also open hearts, take valves out, grind 'em, put in new parts, and when I finish this will work as a new one. So how come you get the big money, when you and me are doing basically the same work? " The doctor leaned over and whispered to the mechanic... "Try to do it when the engine is running".

>>A little old lady goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor I have this >>problem >>with gas, but it really doesn't bother me too much. My farts never >>smell >>and are always silent. As a matter of fact, I've farted at least 20 >>times >>since I've been here in your office. You didn't know I was farting >>because >>they don't smell and are silent." >> >>The doctor says, "I see, take these pills and come back to see me >>next >>week." >> >>The next week the lady comes back. "Doctor," she says, "I don't >>know what >>the heck you gave me, but now my farts..although still >>silent..stink >>terribly." >> >>The doctor says,"Good!!! Now that we've cleared up your sinuses, >>let's >>work on your hearing." >>